Think about this for a minute! There are over 10,000 athletes who compete in a typical modern summer Olympiad. Approximately 600 or so win gold medals. All the rest are losers according to the message of the billboards. What do you think about that? How foreign is that to the Olympic ideal of sportsmanship, fair play, competition, friendship building, and so on? Olympic officials persuaded the powers to be to remove the billboards because their message so contradicted the Olympic spirit. And yet?? I submit that many in our society have bought the line!
I believe this misguided philosophy will only lead to frustration and discouragement. Unless you happen to be in the elite group of 600, all your efforts, hard work, training, sacrifice, and focus, are for nothing. You are a loser! It is nonsense to think such a philosophy can work for us. May I suggest another?I have the privilege of knowing a retired college football coach who knows a lot about winning and success. He is one of the top 10 winning coaches in the history of college football. His teams have won four national championships. He was recently inducted into the National Football Foundation College Hall of Fame. I guess we could say he has been in the elite company of the 600! However, he defines success and winning in very different ways. I am indebted to him for some of the ideas I wish to share with you today.
What is success? Is it the end of the road for you? Or is it the road itself? If winning is the be all and end all, most people will fail. A real winner believes that winning is not the road to success. Winning is the success road! That is, winning is in the journey itself! Winning is an attitude. Winning becomes a by product when we measure success in terms of giving our best. Success is not a comparison of my achievements with the achievements of others. Success is what I do myself in relation to the potential I have to do things. There is a great excitement that comes from personal achievement and becoming the best we can be. A by- product is that our performance level increases. Individuals will gain a new awareness of their personal worth. Confidence will increase. Morale will be raised.
The definition of success as described by our coach friend causes me to measure success in terms of what I can do compared to my best self, not what I can do in relationship to others. This is key. I have learned that comparing myself to others will always lead to frustration. One reason is that my spirit never is satisfied. I may begin by comparing myself to someone I can surpass with my skills and talents. Then I find someone more successful with whom to compare myself. If I am fortunate enough to surpass this person, I will always find still another person even more successful against whom I feel I must compete. Eventually I will meet my match and will find myself falling short and feeling very disappointed. Now I am a failure because I will generally find someone somewhere who makes more money, has a better house, a fancier title, and so on. It is a false measurement.
Do you remember the 1986 Winter Olympics? The movie, Cool Runnings depicts the story of the Jamaican bobsled team in these Olympic games. The very idea is humorous and sounds oxymoronic! Jamaica? ….. Bobsleds? The two do not go together. You will remember that this team raced through the icy curves and corners only to have their steering malfunction near the finish line. Buffeted by the wild ride, the athletes picked up the sled and carried it across the finish line where they were greeted by thunderous applause and cheers from the crowd. This illustrates my point. These Jamaican athletes were winners! We all have failures and disappointments. You may feel that your “steering mechanism” has broken down often as you race through life. Your attitude now becomes the key to your success.You can complain, blame others, and talk about how unfair life is. Or, you can respond with dignity and class to what life brings you, get up, and continue the race! We cheer when we see athletes like the Jamaicans. We admire their class and competitive spirit.
This story illustrates the two points I am trying to make today.
Give your life the best shot, your personal best! Don’t compare yourself with others. Compare yourself with yourself. Attitude is the key!
Here is how a poet put it:
You Can If You Think You Can!
If you think you are beaten, you are,
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you like to win, but you think you can't,
It is almost certain you won't.
If you think you'll lose, you're lost,
For out in the world we find,
Success begins with a fellow's will.
It's all in the state of mind.
If you think you are outclassed, you are,
You've got to think high to rise,
You've got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.
Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man.
But soon or late the man who wins,
Is the man who thinks he can.
~ C. W. Longenecker ~
If you think you are beaten, you are,
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you like to win, but you think you can't,
It is almost certain you won't.
If you think you'll lose, you're lost,
For out in the world we find,
Success begins with a fellow's will.
It's all in the state of mind.
If you think you are outclassed, you are,
You've got to think high to rise,
You've got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.
Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man.
But soon or late the man who wins,
Is the man who thinks he can.
~ C. W. Longenecker ~
Want to talk about it? Know anyone who would like to be encouraged on the success road? A life coach can help you on your journey to success and winning. I invite you to contact me so we can discuss your success road in more detail. You can reach me at rick@icarecoaching.com.
Dr. Rick Penner
Copyright 2008
